(G.e.t) 🤌 (PDF) Start with NO...The Negotiating Tools that the Pros Don't Want You to Know

Start with NO...The Negotiating Tools that the Pros Don't Want You to Know

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Review : Start with No offers a contrarian, counterintuitive system for negotiating any kind of deal in any kind of situation—the purchase of a new house, a multimillion-dollar business deal, or where to take the kids for dinner. Think a win-win solution is the best way to make the deal? Think again. For years now, win-win has been the paradigm for business negotiation. But today, win-win is just the seductive mantra used by the toughest negotiators to get the other side to compromise unnecessarily, early, and often. Win-win negotiations play to your emotions and take advantage of your instinct and desire to make the deal. Start with No introduces a system of decision-based negotiation that teaches you how to understand and control these emotions. It teaches you how to ignore the siren call of the final result, which you can’t really control, and how to focus instead on the activities and behavior that you can and must control in order to successfully negotiate with the pros. The best negotiators: * aren’t interested in “yes”—they prefer “no” * never, ever rush to close, but always let the other side feel comfortable and secure * are never needy; they take advantage of the other party’s neediness * create a “blank slate” to ensure they ask questions and listen to the answers, to make sure they have no assumptions and expectations * always have a mission and purpose that guides their decisions * don’t send so much as an e-mail without an agenda for what they want to accomplish * know the four “budgets” for themselves and for the other side: time, energy, money, and emotion * never waste time with people who don’t really make the decision Start with No is full of dozens of business as well as personal stories illustrating each point of the system. It will change your life as a negotiator. If you put to good use the principles and practices revealed here, you will become an immeasurably better negotiator. Read more

 

Review : This book definitely had some useful tips for negotiators. Some might seem obvious to most people, but you never know. I thought the emphasis on asking questions (the right way -- put simply, do not ask questions that have yes/no answers) instead of making proclamations was useful, if not obvious -- but a great reminder. I did, however, have several issues with it: 1. The author Jim Camp seems a bit full of himself and is long on self-aggrandizing and short on useful examples. It's like it was written by the classic ex-military bloviator. Oh wait, he IS one! 2. Many of the negotiations he claims to have benefitted from his "system" appeared to be over-simplified or even fabricated. 3. There are very few actionable, realistic and reasonable methods offered. It's all high level guidance and it makes you wonder how any of the stuff works. 4. As with most negotiation books I've read, there is little to no useful advice on how to negotiate from a position of weakness (aka when you don't have the leverage advantage). So much of the advice is on the buy side, not the sell side. Here are his "33 Rules" that are apparently available on his web site, but it no longer works. You may be able to see what I'm talking about here. 1. Every negotiation is an agreement between two or more parties with all parties having the right to veto -- the right way to say "no." 2. Your job is not to be liked. It is to be respected and effective. 3. Results are not valid goals. 4. Money has nothing to do with a valid mission and purpose. 5. Never, ever, spill your beans in the lobby -- or anywhere else. 6. Never enter a negotiation -- never make a phone call -- without a valid agenda. 7. The only valid goals are those you can control: behavior and activity. 8. Mission and purpose must be set in the adversary's world; our world must be secondary. 9. Spend maximum time on payside activity and minimum time on nonpayside activity. 10. You do not need it. You only want it. 11. No saving. You cannot save the adversary. 12. Only one person in a negotiation can feel okay. That person is the adversary. 13. All action -- all decision -- begins with vision. Without vision, there is no action. 14. Always show respect to the blocker. 15. All agreements must be clarified point by point and sealed three times (using 3+). 16. The cleaner the picture of pain, the easier the decision-making process. 17. The value of the negotiation increases by multiples as time, energy, money, and emotion are spent. 18. No talking. 19. Let the adversary save face at all times. 20. The greatest presentation you will ever give is the one your adversary will never see. 21. A negotiation is only over when we want it to be over. 22. "No" is good, "yes" is bad, "maybe" is worse. 23. Absolutely no closing. 24. Dance with the tiger. 25. Our greatest strength is our greatest weakness (Emerson). 26. Paint the pain. 27. Mission and purpose drive everything. 28. Decisions are 100 percent emotional. 29. Interrogative-led questions drive vision. 30. Nurture. 31. No assumptions. No expectations. Only blank slate. 32. Who are the decision makers? Do you know all of them? 33. Pay forward.